Contributed by:
J.B. Love - www.IMnotJUSTINBIEBER.com

Why do people post personal messages and other crap on Facebook? The original purpose of this feature was to allow users to inform their friends of their current "status" (i.e. their current feelings, whereabouts or actions). I think "current feelings" is even a bit of a stretch, especially when some people abuse their status updates with t.m.i., too much information.

"Safe and sound in Louisiana!"

"Off to work."

Unacceptable Statuses:

"new ## hit me up if yu aint got it,...jus dun take it personal if I dun give it to yu,cuz if yu associate with c        ,YU AINT GETTIN IT".

"0MG! iM S000000 HUNGRYYYY AND i LiTERALLY HAVE N0 F00D iN MY H0USE. iM GUNNA HAVE T0 G0 T0 TAC0 BELL."

Other unacceptable statuses include topics about your relationships, family problems, work issues, or failing at life in general.

Seriously, use English and not ghetto garbage. Complete sentences and grammar is also greatly appreciated. More importantly, most people don't care to know every detail of your life. Keep your personal woes personal. Save the pity party for your diary. For the people that post these types of statuses, is there some sort of goal or agenda you're trying to accomplish? Complaining about the opposite sex isn't going to change the issue, it's only going to show that you're generalizing the sex based on an experience, which only makes you look dumb.

I think people post these b.s. statuses to attract attention or hope their status will be seen by a specific individual. Also, don't "like" your own status, that's just dumb. Obviously you like it or you wouldn't have posted it. If you post a status, no matter what the subject is, it's open for being made fun of. Unfortunately even sensitive subjects like illness and death statuses could result as the butt end of a joke. Don't get all mad at me or say that I'm insensitive to that stuff, 90% I'm not the kind of person to throw in a joke that could be considered inappropriate.

Some people thrive on making jokes at the wrong time. [See lamebook.com for examples.] However I have no problem with making jokes about break-ups, job loss, bodily injury, bad close-ups of someone's face, or simply just to make fun of you. I never claimed I was nice.

Games:
Even though I'm guilty of this, your game scores don't qualify as a valid Facebook status. If you play games on Facebook that's your perogative, but I don't care about your farm, poker chips, fake pet, mafia, or restaurant needs. Who actually has time to "achieve" these goals. "Hey look, he needs fertilizer and farm feed. Maybe I should waste an hour and help him out." Nope, not gonna happen.

Too many statuses/Fan Pages
How about the people that post a thousand statuses a day. I was once guilty of this, and that's why I created a "fan" page. Although Facebook fan pages are intended for bands, businesses, and "public figures", if you post a million things a day, just pretend you're important and create a fan page. That's the best way to avoid spamming your "friends" with pointless statuses. If you choose to "Like" a fan page, don't complain about the number of statuses that are posted in a day. You're choosing to "like" the page, I doubt someone is putting a gun to your head and saying "Like the effin' page, maggot!" I have friends that complain about the amount of posts on my fan page. To them I say, shut your trap.

Solution:
A perfect alternative to posting to all of these Facebook crimes is Twitter. This 140 character microblog provides you the space to do whatever you want, except post nudity. Your followers are willingly choosing to see your updates and should be well aware of the fact that you're probably going to post tons of useless blabber for their enjoyment. Use it, thanks.

Comments

Submit a Comment

Name

Email (optional, will not be displayed)

Comment

Please leave blank:

Back to all Hot Topics